If you’re unable to control strong sexual desires and urges, that motivate you to seek out a one-night stand on a regular basis, you could be addicted to compulsive sexual behaviour.
Anonymous one-night stands and casual sex are hot, adventurous and thrilling experiences that can offer you instant physiological release, arousal and gratification. But the risqué habit may also impact your life in many detrimental ways.
Although as an adult you’re free to do as you please sexually, one-night stand addiction can reflect on your sense of self-worth and self-esteem, and not in a good way.
Are you addicted?
Being open to taking full advantage of every flirty opportunity that comes your way, on You’ve Pulled – the chat, flirt and dating platform for singles all over the UK – on in person, could be a sign that you’re addicted to pursuing sexual activity.
When the opportunity is presented, a one-night stand addict wastes no time in hooking up with someone they’ve just clicked with. The fact that there’s no emotional entanglement or commitment involved, and no ongoing relationship, adds to the excitement and the overwhelming urge to pursue sexual gratification. Having poor boundaries and drinking too much further intensifies the pleasure you get from sexual anonymity.
In a love relationship, being addicted to one-night stands is associated with cheating and adultery, regardless of whether you’re getting your rocks off with a stranger, work colleague or an acquaintance. Your romantic partner won’t be able to perceive your one-night stand habit as being a connection that’s meaningless and emotionless, because the intimate sexual act is a total relationship deal breaker. A one-time betrayal can therefore result in a breakup of a relationship that you didn’t want to end.
If you’re always on high alert when your partner is away from home, or you view every business trip or night out as a chance to get lucky, it’s probable that you’re addicted to one-night stands. Other susceptibility factors of the high-risk, sexual substance-free condition may include loneliness, fatigue, anger, or frustration.
The four C’s of addiction:
To overcome one-night stand addiction, it’s important to understand what drives the sexual impulse. Craving, compulsion, control, and consequences all play a part in perpetuating addictive sexual behaviour.
Sexual craving is often triggered by memories of successful past situations. Opportunity, mood, state of mind and thrill seeking behaviour are an addict’s top priorities. The triggering of pleasure centred dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins in your brain will drive you to hook up on a one-stand so that you can satisfy the irresistible compulsion sexual urge.
A one-night stand addict sees every encounter as the last, and chooses to believe that they’re unimportant and meaningless. Continuing to ignore there’s a repetitive pattern of behaviour can compromise integrity and result in a loss of control. Once sexual urges are acknowledged and compulsive activity begins, a one-night stand addict will do whatever it takes to remain in a cycle of sexual gratification.
Consequences indicate that you’re fixated on sex and have a problem. A hook up with an acquaintance for casual sex can easily turn into spending hours online checking out dating profiles of hot singles and potential one-night stand partners.
How to overcome:
As with any type of addiction, overcoming an ongoing one-night stand habit comes with withdrawal symptoms. The release of dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins, leading up to and during one-night stand sex, cause you to experience a sense of reward and relief.
Repetitive sexual actions trick your brain into becoming dependent on these feel-good chemicals over time, making it difficult to function normally without the behaviour that triggers them.
Unpleasant and uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms are the norm, when attempting to cease sexual activity that you’re addicted to. Your brain can struggle for a while due to the loss of the activity that fed the desire for pleasure. Agitation, irritability, mood swings, anxiety, depression, difficulty sleeping and a lack of focus are a few of the common withdrawal symptoms that you’re likely to experience.
Talk to your GP about addiction treatment options and support groups in your local area. They may recommend behavioural therapy, counselling, and medication.
A sex addiction therapist will help you identify thought patterns and behaviours that compel you to seek out one-night stands, and that lead to compulsive hypersexuality. So that you’re better able to cope when faced with temptation, you can learn effective strategies to combat sexual urges.
Moderating alcohol and caffeine intake, improving diet and getting adequate sleep will have a positive impact on your journey to overcoming one-night stand addiction. Chatting and flirting (without hooking up) with sexy singles on You’ve Pulled, can also be beneficial, as you’ll be able to learn strategic new and healthy ways to interact with someone you fancy without the need to pursue sexual gratification.